Category: Motivation

About, Business, Careers, Community, Featured, Lifestyle, Motivation, Opinions, TheMBG, Uncategorized, Urban Issues

Fall Back and Spring Forward

shaniselene

As the mark to make a month slowly approaches since I’ve been on a social media hiatus, I’m sad to say that it’s coming to an end. I’d be lying if I said that waking up carefree and not having to check notifications, direct messages or insights hasn’t been refreshing to say the least. I’ve gained so much clarity on specific situations pertaining to business endeavors, business relationships, friendships, school and I’ve learned so much about myself.

Even though my desire to return to social media has dwindled, it’s imperative to my growth as an entrepreneur. I’ve been blessed to obtain additional clients from sharing my content online. I’ve also had the opportunity to meet like minded individuals in the same field.

The most challenging part about my break was accepting the fact that even though I confirmed my perception on this virtual world that we’re so engulfed in, which I already knew, I must admit that it has played an important part in allowing myself to see all of the positive aspects that people see in me. There is nothing more fulfilling than knowing that you can not only encourage, but influence others to be the best they can be, solely by being yourself.

Self awareness is one thing, but when you come to a sudden realization and everything starts coming together, it all makes sense. If you’re feeling overwhelmed, pressured, confused and what to find out the people who are truly in your corner, unplug from everyone and everything. When it’s time for you to make your return, you’ll come back recharged, refreshed and ready to conquer!

#MustKnow, Education, Featured, History, Motivation, Uncategorized, Urban Issues

Women To Know Wednesday: 19 Black women running for judge

Sandré

Black women making political history will always be refreshing news. In this specific case, not one, not three, but 19 women to be acknowledged! In Harris County, Texas, 19 black women will be running for judge in the upcoming election. This will be the county’s largest number of black women seen on a ballot and the FIRST time in history this number of black women will be running for various judicial seats in one county. Definitely women to know!  This being stated, congratulations

Sandra Peake,

Judge Ramona Franklin,

Germaine Tanner,

Angela Graves- Harrington,

Cassandra Hollemon,

Tonya Jones,

Dedra Davis,

LaShawn A. Williams,

Latosha Lewis Payne

Linda M. Dunson,

Toria J. Finch,

Erica Hughes,

Lucia G. Bates,

Ronnisha Bowman,

Michelle Moore,

Sharon Barney,

Shannon Baldwin,

and Lori Chambers Gray!

Furthermore, special thanks to Christin McQueen for capturing such a moment with all candidates in one picture. Congratulations ladies!  Click the link below to see which judicial position each woman is running for.

Women to Know Wednesday

#MustKnow, About, Careers, Faith, Health, Lifestyle, Love, Motivation, Opinions, Relationships, TheMBG, Thoughts of a Black Girl, Uncategorized, Urban Issues

Sacrificing Your Friends For Your Future

shaniselene

It’s important to monitor your inner circle when it comes to pursuing your goals in life. One of the hardest realities I’ve faced has been learning to let go of individuals that have exceeded their expiration date. I used to be one of those people who held onto relationships (both platonic and romantic) based on the amount of time the person has been in my life.

After various events that took place within a friendship of mine, I realized that outgrowing people is a part of life and accepted the fact that everyone isn’t meant to come along during certain parts of my journey. If you care for your loved ones as much as I do, then you’ll understand why this decision wasn’t an easy one. There will be some people that take offense to your choice because they either don’t understand or don’t want to put in the effort to understand that you all may be growing apart and going separate paths.

One of my biggest mistakes were allowing some of those people to make me feel guilty for growing, for becoming the woman I am and wanting more for myself. Rather than encouraging me, I was ignored, called conceited and selfish. They were wrong about every description except classifying me as, “selfish”.  Even though I’m not a self absorbed person, for the past (6) months I’ve been extremely selfish with my funds, time and things I put my energy into. They say that your 20’s are the perfect time to think about yourself.  This is the time to make decisions for yourself and highly consider what’s best for you; it isn’t the time to settle. 

After having an epiphany and grasping what that concept really meant, I no longer felt the need to apologize for the decisions I’ve been making. I quickly learned that my true friends who genuinely supported me resided in different parts of the world. Sometimes we get so caught up on accessibility and fail to realize that just because something is available and tangible doesn’t always mean it’s in our best interest.

You want to ensure that those around you call you to the carpet when you’re slacking. Your friends must be able to hold you accountable for your actions even when they aren’t the best. They need to have the ability to feed your spirit and pour into you when you don’t have the energy to do it for yourself. 

In no way, shape or form am I telling you to drop your, “day 1’s”. However, I do encourage you to decipher who your are keeping in your life, why you are keeping them in your life and if they deserve to stay.

#MustKnow, Featured, History, Motivation, TheMBG

Women to Know Wednesday: Jahana Hayes, First-Time Candidate, Wins Democratic House Primary in Connecticut

Sandré

It’s not how you start, but how you finish! Jahana Hayes is proof of this. Born & raised in the public housing projects of Waterbury, Connecticut under the care of her grandmother, Hayes became a mom at the age of 17. Becoming “just another statistic” and a product of her environment seemed to not have been an option. She did go on to attend and graduate from Southern Connecticut State and eventually became a teacher. With over 10 years of educator experience in subjects such as: World History, Roots of American Citizenship, Civics & Geography, U.S. History, and African American History, she was named Teacher of the Year in 2016. This nomination was honored by President Barack Obama, himself in the flesh, May 3, during National Teacher Appreciation Week at the White House!

She is an active member of the Connecticut Education Association and passionate about education and reminding our youth that their circumstances do not dictate their outcome and that they can do anything they want to do, dream wise. After receiving Teacher of the Year in 2016, she took the following year to represent educators all around the nation and be a spokesperson for the teaching profession through travel and various speaking engagements. This modern day beauty who is now 45, had little to none political experience, AND a first time candidate WON the Democratic House Primary in Connecticut making her the first African- American Woman to represent Connecticut Congress. Jahana Hayes is definitely a woman to know!

Screen Shot 2018-08-29 at 6.03.51 PM

 “Being constantly faced with negative media perceptions surrounding teaching practices and a perceived lack of accountability makes me much more determined to be vocal and supportive of teachers and teaching as a profession.”

If Hayes is elected in November, she will be the first black woman of either party to represent part of New England in Congress. To all my modern day beauties I encourage you to do your research, get involved, and if through research you find one of our sisters deserving of the position they are going for, GET OUT AND VOTE!

#MustKnow, About, Careers, Community, Education, Faith, Health, Healthcare, Lifestyle, Motivation, Opinions, TheMBG, Uncategorized, Urban Issues

For the Love of Medicine

shaniselene

I recently began my clinical rotations at Florida Hospital this past week and although shadowing is not a requirement, it makes your medical school resume more competitive. This experience not only has altered my perception of life, but I’ve gained a newfound appreciation for my well being. Seeing numerous people with a variety of chronic illnesses and diseases opened my eyes to the lack of knowledge surrounding health. 

One patient in particular has been battling sickle cell disease for their entire life; she’s forty years old and a mother of two. Along with excruciating joint pain and body aches, she was also in need of an oxygen mask due to having difficulty breathing. Thankfully, she has the support of her parents to assist with her illness and children, but I can only imagine her daily stressors.

It’s sometimes hard to fathom why bad things happen to good people, but unfortunately, that is life. There is no easy way to accept these circumstances, but this is what makes the job of a physician special because they have the ability to either find cures or assist with prolonging the life of the patient. This experience has further much confirmed my reasoning to pursue my specialty of interest because it breaks my heart to see those in pain. Dermatology not only allows me to educate others about skin care and assist with clearing their skin, but empower them and build their self confidence.

I highly advise those of you who are premed students or anyone interested in pursuing a career in the medical field to not only shadow at a private practice, but at an actual hospital. It will allow you to see what you’re interested in, as well as what you can and can’t handle. Being a medical professional includes having to keep your composure even during high stress situations. If you have a genuine passion to help those and love medicine, then go for it. Yes it will be a challenging journey, but the outcome will be rewarding.

Featured, Motivation, Opinions, Thoughts of a Black Girl

Mind over matter – Do you see the good in every situation or do you see the worse?

Sandré

What type of mindset do you have? Do you see the good in every situation or do you see the worse? When things aren’t going your way or you are unsatisfied, do you actively take steps to try and fix it or do you complain with no action. Voicing our concerns and dislikes is normal. Some of us do it more than usual, but nonetheless it is normal. The questions we must ask ourselves however are, “what am I doing to change this? “Am I actively looking for better?” and “Am I working towards a solution behind the scenes as I work my way up?” The way you approach a task, circumstance, or whatever may be in this life can make or break you.

I’m aware that life at times is unfair. Some events that transpire are unavoidable, are by no means our fault, and run deeper than a mind over matter concept. Some events require outside help and will take time to regain an optimistic mental space. But for the events that fall outside of these boundaries, focusing in on how to use what transpired to your advantage or remaining optimistic is everything.

Despite the interview going well, you didn’t get the job. Are you going to stop applying for jobs and dwell on that specific rejection? The relationship didn’t work out. Are you going to divert all your energy into trying to make him or her pay and never love again? Felicia said your head was big. Are you going to wear sun hats all through November? NO!!! How you react, the mindset you willingly take on amidst the sickness, the downfall, or certain circumstances will either be fuel to your triumph or ammo for things to only get worse. Keep your head up and push through. Exercise your willpower. You may not have control of every situation, but you are your own person and you do have control over your mindset. Tap into your determination.

Reflect on what you felt went wrong during the interview or what you can do to be better or more prepared for the one to come. Get your resume looked over again. Watch a YouTube video on how to answer common tricky questions.

(P.S. before my “how to answer so and so question” YouTube binge, my go to answer for the infamous “what is a weakness” question, I would always answer that I’m a perfectionist! According to my findings, this is actually a pretty awful response!)

Heartbreak sucks, but I assure you trying to hurt them back only counteracts your blessings to come and is a waste of time, entirely. Re-adjust your mental lenses and refocus. Reclaim your time by doing things that make you smile, bring you closer to your goals, or be a service to others (give back!). Love will find you again.

Flaunt your God given features. One person will say “she ain’t that cute” the next will say “she fine as hell!” We are all ugly to somebody and we all fine to somebody as well. Such is life. Nonetheless, whatever the next person may think will not change who you are. Embrace your uniqueness, own your sexiness. Subscribe to blogs or other social media platforms that don’t solely display European beauty standards, but embraces all shades, features, and sizes!

You control where your energy and efforts go. Feed your willpower! Mind over matter, because everything doesn’t matter and your mindset is such a powerful thing.

Happy Monday! The end of July is here, and August is  right around the corner and I hope it’s nothing short of amazing.

 

 

Beauty, Community, Lifestyle, Motivation, Opinions, Thoughts of a Black Girl, Urban Issues

Confidence Is Skin Deep

shaniselene

From adolescence, women are taught that beauty is vital. It’s attractive and the key to gaining a man’s attention, but what about confidence? Whether it’s on television, radio, magazines or social media, we are subconsciously reminded that beauty is heavily based upon the external. While most of us may be saying, “I’m confident with or without makeup”, but we all know there has been a point in time where we’ve felt the complete opposite.

Other than a pasty complexion, I take pride in a fresh face because it is all natural. Based on my past experiences, every person I’ve ever been involved with has either said they prefer me without makeup or I don’t need it. Although that isn’t enough to cease my cosmetic application completely, there is something liberating that comes along with wanting to wear makeup, but not needing to. During the recovery period from one of the biggest allergic reactions I’ve ever experienced, I had epiphany and realized my self confidence was at the lowest it has ever been.

I’ve never had acne or problematic skin, so acquiring contact dermatitis from a cosmetic product that I’ve been using for the last (5) years gave me the opportunity to empathize with those who do.  Who knew that having red spots on your face could affect how you felt about yourself overall? Regardless if they are temporary, the biggest issue was that I was uncomfortable because I’ve never experienced this before.

Even though this was a new feeling, I am a grateful for what I endured because it made me realize that I also had superior confidence within myself when everything was normal, but my self-esteem was questioned upon signs of trouble. I also learned that we tend to make things greater than what they are due to being self-conscious. Either people didn’t notice or my imperfections were insignificant because it did not prevent them looking or coming up and speaking to me. This was a clear indication that I was overthinking the entire situation and that I started relying on my exterior versus what I have to offer from within. This is no excuse, but it’s easier said than done when you are constantly reminded of your outer beauty.

This is why I encourage makeup free days for those who are uncomfortable without makeup. At the end of the day, you have to be happy with your reflection when you look in the mirror. I feel blessed to have self confidence with or without makeup, but I’m also thankful that I had this recent experience because it displayed my true self, gave me more confidence because it reminded me that I am more than my aesthetics and humbled me. The moment you’re able to feel as good as you do as you look on the outside, it’s like you become a whole new woman.

Community, Motivation, Opinions

The Power of Words

Sandré

How many of you believe that life and death is in the power of the tongue? How many of you believe that words truly have power? Consider some of the things you have spoken in the past intentionally or jokingly. Do you find that what you spoke eventually manifested its way into existence? Words having power is natural law. When I think of the common childhood rebuttal, “sticks and stones may break my bones, but words will never hurt me,” I think to myself: wow, this quote couldn’t be any further from the truth than it already is. Physical pain is temporary. Words however can stay in your subconscious forever. We’ve all had hurtful words spoken to us or over our life at some point and unfortunately, if we are not careful we attach such words to our identity, to our daily train of thought which then turns into an insecurity and thinking less of ourselves.

I remember having a bully in 7th grade that intentionally belittled me every single day. Prior to this happening, I never really had anything I disliked about myself. I wasn’t aware of personal physical features that may be perceived as flaws to others. A lot of my past and current insecurities started there. By the grace of God, I then crossed paths with an amazing teacher in high school that became a mentor and a friend. She was such a confident and vibrant individual who poured all of that and so much life lessons and concepts on to me. I highlight these two time periods to acknowledge my personal encounters with the power of words. This individual from 7th grade planted that seed of insecurities and self-doubt, but my teacher gave me the tools to uproot that negativity and begin my journey of self-love and newfound confidence.

This being stated, it’s so important to speak life out loud, to others, and most importantly to yourself! Don’t allow others, especially those who claim to care about you, talk to you any type of way. You are more than enough. You were made with purpose and intention and words can serve as a tool to allow you to believe this and own it!

Words of affirmation:

Words that are positive. Words that are encouraging. Words that provide emotional support, mental upliftment, and/or a declaration of a thought, idea, or goal.

Every morning when I wake up I compliment myself and verbally declare the type of day I’m going to have and claim what it is I wish to receive.

“I am beautiful”
“I am healthy”
“No weapon formed against me shall prosper”
“I have all my needs coming with speed”
“I am expecting….”  Ect.
Declare what is NOT as well!
“I am NOT less than”
“I am NOT going to end up like…”
“I am NOT ….. ect.”

Does doing this guaranteed you will have an amazing day or that you won’t find yourself reflecting on an unfortunate event? Of course not. The unexpected can be expected in this life and we are human. We aren’t high off life 24/7, however starting each day projecting positivity over yourself and your life help put peace of mind in motion. It takes the weight off of that unfortunate event that may come and gives you something to look forward to because when you claim things for your life, best believe once you put it out there into the universe, slowly but surely, things are going to begin to shake and rearrange things in your favor!

Talk to yourself:

  • Have full blown conversations with yourself when alone.
  • Compare your pros and cons to yourself out loud.
  • Vent outload in your car like your inner best self is sitting in that passenger seat taking everything in and ready to respond!

Talking to yourself is how you get to know yourself!

Meditate:

There are various ways to meditate. You don’t have to be sitting crisscross with your eyes closed. You don’t have to chant a mantra in a dark room. Meditation is simply focusing your mind on a particular thought, activity, or object. Whether you can successfully do that with music blasting or candles lit in a tub, it is personal and whatever works for you.

 This being stated, use this moment to

  • Reflect
  • Dissect a situation
  • Give thanks
  • focus on all that is good
  • Acknowledge uplifting words to describe you

Filter what you take in:

You are what you eat, literally and mentally. Are the main people you hang around debbie downers? Do you watch shows that subconsciously plant negativity or distort the way you see yourself or your people? Do you only listen to podcasts that bash and gossip?

In your free time are you lurking or reading over something that you know takes you out of character or working towards a goal or doing something you enjoy?

 Be mindful of what you allow to consume your mind because words have power.

Happy Monday loves, hope it’s nothing short of amazing and productive.

Community, Motivation, Thoughts of a Black Girl

Monday kick: Vision

Sandré

How many of you have shared a dream or vision with someone and he or she quickly shut it down or began telling you what they think you should or shouldn’t do? Sometimes what may seem like the most logical and reasonable thing to do might be what will lead to you feeling trapped, confused, and unhappy. I believe people’s negative doubts regarding our visions and ambitions tend to come from their personal past experiences, fear of change, mixed emotions, fear of the unknown, or from a perception of simply not understanding. Don’t be so quick to let others determine your plan of action. Don’t burden yourself with trying to make them understand. Don’t fear being judged. Don’t fear small beginnings. Turn all fear into fuel to get what you want. Pray. Meditate. Sit on it. Listen to that inner voice. I recently had an amazing conversation with a phenomenal woman last week and these words truly resonated with me:

“Do you. Don’t be afraid of what people will think. A lot of people are not even doing what they want to do, so don’t let them tell you what you should or shouldn’t do. Make your own lane!”                                                                                                   

  – Michelle Welch.

I Hope everyone had a lovely weekend and will have an even lovelier Monday. Check these sources out below for a further Monday motivation kick. Whether you play it as you get dressed, cook, or driving in your car. Starting the day with inspiring content goes a long way!

xoxo 

Happy Monday!

Lisa Nichols –  How to turn fear into fuel

Les Brown –  Commit yourself to what you want

Gary V. –  Worried about being judged  (his motivational videos tend to have a lot of profanity, so if you’re sensitive to foul language, no worries, feel free to skip!)

 

#MustKnow, Beauty, Business, Careers, Community, Education, Faith, Featured, Health, Lifestyle, Motivation, Opinions, TheMBG, Thoughts of a Black Girl, Uncategorized

Blessings In Disguise

shaniselene

The most gut wrenching aspect about life is the simple fact that regardless of the choices you make for yourself, you will never be in complete control of your circumstances. If you’re a perfectionist like myself, the activities that take place in your daily routine are predominately scheduled. Whether it be event and work meetings or the day, time and amount of funds that are to be removed in order to contribute to bills, everything is done in a timely manner. Unfortunately, you come to the realization that although you make your best efforts to ensure that you’ve dotted all of your, “I’s” and crossed all of your, “T’s”, unforeseen events still take place. 

A perfect example of this was when I originally moved into my condo. I was about (3) months in and the 1st week of the month quickly approached and I noticed a notification from my real estate company stating that the confirmation number for this month’s rent reflected an incomplete payment. To my surprise, I called my bank to find out that I was a victim of card theft and due to suspicious activity taking place on my account, they decided to freeze it. I was grateful that the institution whom I bank with was able to locate the discrepancy before any further damage took place on my account, but frustrated because due to their inability to notify me in a timely manner, my rent was late and an additional late fee was added to my overall payment. Had I foreseen this in the future, I would’ve transferred my funds into my second account.

I provided this past experience because it served as a teaching moment. There have been so many unexpected things taking place in my life in which I lack understanding. Typically when I endure these kind of events, God is up to something; something in which I prayed for. Storms always come before your shower of blessings, but it’s important to handle them in manner that reflects your trust for Him. Everything I’ve been asking Him is coming to fruition, but not in the way I thought it would. Usually, it happens this way; we ask for things, but then begin to question our desires because it doesn’t happen how or when we want it to. I ask that you be encouraged, stay focused and endure the storm because your time is coming.